Thursday, April 7, 2011

Why Night Auditors Should ALWAYS Sleep 8 Hours a Day are freaking creepy at night.  Yeah, sure, most nights you'll handle it just fine with your music, your computer, your phone, your studies.  But there WILL be those nights when it's just quiet enough for you to hear every spooky ass phantom tossing dishes around, every ghost stomping here and there, every shadowy figure sneaking up on you.

So for the love of god sleep, SLEEP.  These things are easier to handle when you aren't groggy.

But I don't sleep.  Nope.  I do my best and hey, I frequently succeed, but I had a doctor's appointment.

Anyhoo, here, have the freaky-ass shit that has gone down tonight:

  1. Starting at 4 AM the fire alarm control pad that we recently fixed (after quite the fiasco and a few weeks of patient waiting) started beeping.  No, not really, more like emitting a constant tone.  Only there was no message on the screen.  Normally it will say something like "crud, something's up on the third floor, guys!"  This time, all it says is System Idle.  Sometimes it randomly resets itself.  This is the weirdest and most annoying thing in the whole world.  I will literally sit one butt cheek down only to have to hop right back up and go stop it from screaming again.  My poor, right butt cheek is so unfulfilled.
  2. Upon my first arrival in the lobby I noted a high pitch tone, but couldn't locate it.  The last shift didn't hear anything, but gosh darnit, I know I'm not completely crazy.  It's in here somewhere.  And it has been going since 11 PM.
  3. I keep hearing voices just down the hall, but that might just be the music.  I keep checking because it really, really sounds like someone talking.
  4. While sitting down on the other side of the lobby, only the inner set of doors slid open randomly and back shut.  There were no bugs, no people, no anything near them.  Creeeepy.
  5. When I got in the elevator to deliver newspapers and bills it made a loud crack-thump sound and shuddered before taking me to the second floor.
  6. Upon arriving on the third floor, I turned out of the elevator to see the fire alarm door shut.  They're magnetic, so I can't just open it.  I was pretty positive I was going to open it to find a bunch of zombies on the other side.
  7. On both the third and fourth floors, a few of the doors were propped open but the lights out.  This is particularly disturbing to me, because I know nobody checked out early last night.  Technically I am supposed to shut them, but what if someone is in there??
  8. On the fourth floor I look out the hall window from down the hall to see what looks like headlights.  On the fourth floor.  Alright, so it turned out to be the lights of the business next door, but it was really freaky, okay?
  9. Someone/thing just made a loud clattery/shuffle sound in the kitchen.
  10. The door to the back office keeps slowly opening by itself.

This is why you need good rest.

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