Friday, October 29, 2010


Yep, I definitely just typed in  Can you picture what a blooger would look like?  Glorious.  XD

Well, I'm glad the FIVE check-ins we were expecting tonight never came in, because if they had, I wouldn't have been able to get them into their rooms.  When I got here, the left computer was not communicating to the card machine.  Now neither computer will talk to it.  It tells you it'll make the card, but that message neeeever gets to the encoder machine you slide the card into.  Marvelous!

So this fellow comes in through the side door and intends to get into his room that is RIGHT THERE.  Instead, he finds he has to walk down to the front desk because his card will let him into the building, but not his room!  Weird?  Yes.

I can't encode him a new one, but wait!  There's a card machine in the back, with a computer full of permissions to make wonky-cool cards.  So I head back and try it out.  It does not allow me to make cards.  It goes through the whole form you fill out on what you want it to make, but when you click make card - zilch.

So I make the guy walk all the way back down to try my master card.  My master card does not work either!  So I search the front desk for the other MC.  Nothing!  So I wake my boss up, make him talk me through it on the phone.  He hath no suggestions but to make another MC.  So I do, I walk all the way back, and voila - access at last.  Not that he'll ever be able to leave his room again.

Hey, by the way!
(photo from here)


Thursday, October 21, 2010

Awkward Silences Galore!

Your normal awkward silence lasts one, maybe two responses, tops.  Then the hovering, then one of you goes away or changes the subject.

But oh, not this awkward silence of epicosity.

It was morning, and people were starting to come down for breakfast.  A woman came up to the counter and asked how often we restock our salads.  Actually, she didn't.  She asked about...three other questions that tangentally concluded with asking how often we restock our salads, or where we get them from.

Honestly, I'm not sure.  I told her I believed they were pre-prepared and that we made an effort each morning to make sure there are some available in the case.  (Insert awkward silence here)  She wanders off for a second, slowly turns around, comes back and asks me who prepares them.  Awkward silence #2 may have been my fault, while I try to figure out if she was asking something different than I had answered.  I reiterated that I thought they were pre-prepared, and asked if she would like one.

Awkward silence #3, followed by a response from her saying that she had wanted one the night before, or possibly the night before that, but that they hadn't been there.  She said she had just seen someone buy one earlier, so she wanted to know how we got them there.  I...I repeated...that the day shifts restock when we are low...

She starts to wander off again, then slowly returns.  Awkward silence #4 while she stares at me for a minute, and I try to fill it by dumbly yet politely asking her if I can get her anything.  She asks "but you have pretty decent food places nearby, right?"

I answer yes, and she hovers, returning and wandering off, for about the next five minutes while I help other people and wait for her to make an actual request.

Most epic awkward silenceness of all time.

Right?  @.o

Wednesday, October 20, 2010


That post just wasn't lol-y at all.  Here's a fun fact to make up for it:

Something in the back room is very, very stinky.


Why You Should NOT Book with Expedia

Or really any of those services that tell you they get you leftover rooms for less.

The first reason is the blatant way they are set up.  They are very specifically making a business out of ripping off hotels.  The appeal is that if the hotel doesn't sell the room, they make less than if you book it through them, right?  Except that the hotel WOULD sell that room, to you in fact, so Expedia, Priceline, and all of those fellas aren't really helping us out now, are they?   There's also the fact that you pay them upfront, then they pay the hotel when you check out.  If you never check out, because something went wrong and you never even checked in, Expedia just keeps that entire sum.  The hotel only receives a portion of what you paid Expedia, so don't expect a bill that matches what your credit card was charged.  Your $90 rate you paid Expedia?  Yeah, we got about $60 of that.  That difference is their profit, they're not gonna refund it, and apparently they like to pretend it's some fault of the hotel's instead of just saying so.  Sound friendly, don't they?  But anyways.

The real reason  you shouldn't book with companies like Priceline and related names is because...they're assholes.  Since they are paid upfront, their customer service is zilch.  Let me explain what happened to a fellow last week who booked a room with Expedia.

It was around 1:00 AM or so, and the hotel was completely booked.  My expected arrivals list was empty.  Everyone was in bed.  Imagine my surprise when an additional person walks in to check in, claiming he had a reservation.  I double-check my expected arrivals in case he was already checked in by an earlier shift, but his name wasn't in the system, period.  He was a part of a group that was definitely in our hotel, but no reservation for him had actually been made.  He immediately called Expedia, through whom he had made his reservation, and remained on the phone with them or on hold for the next, oh, 45 minutes or so.  He was still on hold with them when he left.

I called every sister property and hotels I didn't even know existed, and every single hotel was at full occupancy.  I called the reservation central line to see if they had any record of him at all.  Nada.  He showed me the email he received from Expedia with a useless "itinerary number" and no confirmation number FROM the hotel to show it had been set up.  It took us the full 45 minutes or so to finally find a place nearby that had one room left and could take him.

So.  What exactly happened?

Expedia told him he could have the room.  Expedia did not do their part and actually arrange the reservation with the hotel.  Therefore, fellow is left without a place to stay in the middle of the night, is still out the entire sum to Expedia who may or may not transfer the issue to the different hotel, and he's stuck on the phone with them for ages.  Oh, and it wasn't just them they were screwing over.  They called me, too:

Call #1:
"Good evening and thank you for calling the LOL Hotel, my name is Wednesday, how may I assist you?"
"Hi this is bitch from Expedia, calling about a Mr. Completely Screwed.  We've just been notified (by the guy sitting across the counter from me on hold with them that very instant...) that while you had a reservation for him, you cannot provide him a room.  Is that correct?"
" did not set up the reservation.  He is not in the system, Reservations does not have a record of a reservation for him, and he was never sent a confirmation number."
"So you will not be able to provide him with a room tonight, is that correct?"
"No.  We are at 100% occupancy."
"Okay, then.  Goodbye."

Call #2, about 10 minutes later in the midst of calling other hotels:
"Good evening, thank you for calling the LOL Hotel, my name is Wednesday, how may I assist you?"
"Hello this is Bitch from Expedia again, and I was calling to see if we needed to be finding another room for Mr. Completely Screwed, or if you would be taking care of that. (What the hell have they been doing while they had him on hold, huh?)"
"I'm just dialing numbers - if there is a way for you to fix the problem and find him a place to stay for the night I would appreciate it."
"Well...we could do that...we would have to do a search within the local area (duh?).  I'll send the information over to Whatever Desk."
"Thank you (for fixing the problem you created for this poor man)."

Call #3, about 5 minutes later:
"Good evening and thank you for calling the LOL Hotel, my name is Wednesday, how may I assist you?"
"Hello, this is Bitch from Expedia.  I was calling to ask if your hotel would still be charging Expedia for the room?  (WHAT ROOM?)"

Now, at this point I COULD say that we don't charge until checkout anyways, so no, we're not charging for something we didn't have.  But that guy was still sitting at the counter, flipping through the phonebook with me and dialing on my cell while he's on hold with them on screw 'em.

"I don't have access to that information (you greedy hoes).  Try calling Sales in the morning."
"Okay, goodbye."

I wish with all my heart that I could describe exactly how frustrating the entire situation was.  Expedia dropped the ball, blamed the hotel, stuck a guy on hold for ages while I can only assume they played ping pong in the back, did not assist in finding a new room for the poor guy, were rude to the both of us, then asked if they got to keep the money or not.

I am not saying this because it will somehow profit me.  I'm saying this for YOUR good, so you know what I didn't know until I started working here:


No company should do that to its customers, and on so regular of a basis.

Grrrbrrrgrhrhrh.  Rrr.

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Very Attractive!

It's 6 or so in the morning, and this amazingly sexy man comes walking through the lobby.  He pauses in front of the counter to look at the television behind me, and I'm trying not to stare.  He's tall, shaggy dark hair, thin and muscled...he's total eye candy.

I'm praying he looks my way.  The butterflies are taking over my insides.  I risk a glance over and...

The ice drawer behind me leaks its periodic melted ice into a half-filled bucket below, filling the lobby with a good 10 seconds or so of the exact sound of peeing in a toilet.  I shuffle around, in part to prove I'm not peeing on the floor.  Sexy man promptly leaves.

Damn you, ice drawer, damn you.


Tuesday, October 5, 2010

OMG, there's another one

So yeah.. did anyone ever mention that I absolutely suck at remembering to do things at a time I am capable of doing whatever that thing is that I was supposed to be doing?

And with that monstrosity of a sentence is apparently how I will introduce myself to this blog :) Hello all, I am Pushpin, the other person supposed to be posting here. I used to work nights (which is where the best stories come from in my opinion) but am now working day shifts (which is the only time I've had to deal with creepy old men).

And yay! I now have an intro post!! Done. :D