Wednesday, September 22, 2010


Good morning and thank you for calling the LOL Hotel, my name is Wednesday, how may I assist you?

No really...hi!

This blog's about the sincerely weird stuff you run into working at a hotel - especially all alone at the night shift.  Everyone's got stories, and lots of them!  Mmkay.  About us!

I started working night audit at a hotel just recently.  I should almost certainly not say where.  I'd never worked in one before, so most of my stories are really, really recent.  I'm a n00b.  There be another fine lass co-writing this tale of weirdness and debauchery with me who be more experienced than I, but I'll let her write her own introduction.  She's bad-arse.

None of the names in this blog are real, though the stories most certainly are.  Some are funny, some are awful, and some are just freaky.

Today's little piece of story I bring to share with you involves the telephone.  (Duh duh duhhh!)  For the first few hours of my shift tonight, it was ringing off the hook.  Every few minutes I'd be up again to answer it, which involved making a couple of people wait on me - something I really hate to do.  In any case.  About half of these calls, really the majority toward the end of it, involved either complete silence or an odd beeping going off every one to two seconds.  Needless to say, it was frustrating.

Our phones have limited caller ID - you can tell if the call is coming from a specific room or outside the hotel.  Unfortunately, all outside calls appear the same, so there was NO way for me to tell when I was getting a legitimate call or a...ghost?  prank?  malfunction?  This meant that every single ring I had to run over and recite my exhaustive, rehearsed introduction only to be sometimes cut off by that damned beep.  Yup.  Good stuff.

*Ring ring ring*
"Good morning!
Thank you for calling the _____,
My name is _____,
How may I assist you?"

It mocked me, it really did.  It finally stopped around 3 am or so, thank goodness.  -.-

This has been your moment of Zen LOL.

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