Friday, September 24, 2010

Ooh, another one!

Okay, I haven't even given the other pretty lady a chance to post her introduction yet, but I've already got another story!  :D

Alright, so we all know that people in the middle of the night get weird.  I was told this, and outside of robbery or sexual harrassment I'm pretty much a "bring it on!" kinda gal.  Weird's good by me.

But weird is also hilarious, so let me share this quick tidbit.

A fellow just came by and parked his truck in the drive-thru thingy.  He hopped out, came inside, and very seriously asked me if we have adult rentals.  I had to ask him to repeat it before it hit me that he was asking if we had porn.  Now...I've never stayed at a hotel in my life that didn't offer porn on the tube.  $30/night motels have porn.  Any hotel with a television, has it to sell you porn.  I could have said why, sure we do!  But to be perfectly honest, I didn't want to check him in.

See, it was 4:45 AM.  I'd already done audit.  He was going to be in the hotel for what, 6, 7 hours?  Plus, walk-ins are a serious bitch here.  Plus, he was goddamned creepy and I didn't want to be around a fella paying $130 for a couple pornos just before the crack of freakin' dawn.  Nobody ever showed this guy how to use the internet?  

So what I said was, "I'm sorry, I don't have a program of what ppv we offer."

So he leaves.  And when I say he leaves, what I mean is, he drives his truck BACKWARDS down the entire parking lot (instead of driving forward which is obviously intended), goes to the hotel next door to us, and asks THEM if WE offer "adult rentals."  See?  Weird = hilarious.

They tell the creepy man that we do.  Creepy man returns, requests a room.  Remember how I said walk-ins were a serious pain here?  I connected him to a center in Europe and passed the phone over the counter.  Then I checked him in.  It was all I could do not to offer him lotion.

LOL Hotel - happy to help you jerk it.


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